I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize