Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize