I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
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