he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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