shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
