You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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