Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Randomize