Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
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