Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
Randomize
