If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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