i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
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