We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Randomize
