so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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