Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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