There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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