Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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