She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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