And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
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