nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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