let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
