Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
