Whod you bang
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
