four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
