i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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