There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
