a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Can't talk, ducks in the car
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize