So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Randomize
