I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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