If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
