Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
