There is no way he is gay with that hair.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
