dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
MIDGETS
????
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
