I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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