roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
You made out with two different species that night
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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