I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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