I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize
