so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
