all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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