I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Randomize
