I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize