nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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