bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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