So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
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constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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