just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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