Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
