I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
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