He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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