that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Randomize
