I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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