Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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