Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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